Tonight is my night.

I'm alone.

Finally.

After weeks of social interaction and incredible moments with some of my favorite people, I can finally ... relax. It's not easy for me to just sit back and give myself room to breathe. I like breathing and all, but sometimes when I stop for too long, I begin to hear things that scare me ... things that I've been trying to ignore and drown out with the noise of my life. (usually things like, "leave everything you know and move to california," "let people take care of you," etc.)

I've been in this place before. Many times. When I've been running for long enough that God finally throws road blocks too thick for me to dance around.

A year ago, I found myself in a car with my grandparents, arriving at my new home in Southern California. The adventure and pure exhilaration of trying something new was enough to last me through an entire year of self-discovery and transitioning. Now, in this place I call home, I am being beckoned to embark on another journey of equal risk and greater faith. One that requires I find what I'm made of at the core.

So, a year later (after leaving Oz), I'm much closer to being the person I always felt I could be. I'm happy. Energized. Passionate. Daring. Compassionate. Strong. Independent. I've surrounded myself with people who show me what life looks like through different eyes. And, as of late, I've become very aware of the fears I need to conquer.

This year has been breathtaking.

I relax willingly tonight after a year well spent ...

livin.the.dream.