i have this incredible ability to acquire stressful situations in clumps.
take this week, for instance:
alice and i found out we are moving next weekend on monday. great! that's possitive stress because we're sooo looking forward to it.
then on tuesday, my job decides to kick into double over drive. why? oh, because i'm trying to finalize plans for my three week india/china trip that takes place the week after i move into my new place. again, good stress ... i mean, hey, i'm traveling overseas doing what i love for three weeks so i shouldn't be complaining.
then there's school. six credit units of master's classes and books that are staring me in the face ... taunting me as i try and get at least ONE thing done a day (which doesn't happen to include home work).
but here's where it gets a bit ridiculous. on top of moving, i'm having to find a replacement roommate, which means fielding the constant flow of email responses to my craigslist ad and scheduling time for my other two roommates to interview these individuals. on top of THAT we had a bit of an argument last night over money (it's always about money isn't it?) which totally stressed me out and made me feel like a complete jerk (but, i don't want to get screwed over either). and worst of all, i had unintentionally hurt vince. because in the midst of all these transitions, i have successfully left no time for him and i to spend together before i leave the country for three weeks.
oh, and i forgot to mention ... my birthday is a few days after we move into our new place (and a few days before i leave the country) and it's the big 2.5. so you better believe i've been using what little energy i have left to round people up for that!
all of this semi "good stress" has now equated to not-so-good stress.
sigh.
so my question ... is there ever a good time to go through transitions and embrace new opportunities? will we ever really be prepared for them?
if i knew it was going to be this insane for a few weeks, would i have made the decision to do what i really wanted? hmmm. would we ever step into moments that are too large for us if we knew how small we'd feel while we were in them?
Thursday, January 31, 2008
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8 comments:
we are seperated at birth.
well, plus or minus 3 years.
but seriously.
one - if i wasn't going to be in africa, i would fly out to LA. i love the standard. get the edemame.
two - you summarized my thoughts so perfectly in your last sentence.
wow.
we are seperated at birth.
well, plus or minus 3 years.
but seriously.
one - if i wasn't going to be in africa, i would fly out to LA. i love the standard. get the edemame.
two - you summarized my thoughts so perfectly in your last sentence.
wow.
Krysta, that's some good stuff.
I love where your head's at.
Miss you friend.
well, anne. i'm moving into a loft that is only 2 blocks from the the standard. sooo. you should come whenever you'd like ... stay at my place for free and explore the wonders of l.a. with me :)
todd. you're the best. :) thanks for the kind words (and for still reading my blog even though it has been a bit lame lately).
I was out there for three years during seminary (Talbot/Biola). It was not my thing so congrats on the loft and more power to you!
Cheers.
(PS - I do love San Diego so it's not a big city thing...just a sit in traffic for 2+ hours everyday thing! And my brother works at the Dream Center out there.)
www.nathangann.com
your final sentence/question is poignant. and perfect.
having known anne for... well... forever... i can honestly say by just reading a little bit of your blog, that you could definitely be sisters. i'll definitely be back here. :)
Ahhh! hindsight and regret. the banes of my existance. I say, you SHOULD live for the future, take chances and make change based on your heart.
That said, I have a hard time doing all of those things, especially when sitting around in the same old situation and complaining about it is so much easier. haha. But, we can all change, and I have been trying to live my *best life* I think moving is the first step for you in finding yours. The transitions are always full of drama and heartache, and no, I don't think we would make those choices if we knew how hard they would be. It's like being in a relationship, the lies we tell ourselves to give us the courage to commit to someone, to marry them. The lies parents-to-be tell each other to face the hardships of parenting. The beautiful way in which our sensitive human souls protect us from the realization and crippling fear of change by blurring the pain in those memories and allowing us to move forward...
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